My book of poetry, "Stripping- My fight to find Me" is a story of the triumph of the human spirit. It is a story of our deep need for connection and the infinite power of love to heal.

Hello,
It’s Sunita here.

I am a poet, an author, a wife, a mother, a clinician and a childhood trauma survivor. I healed when I understood that I was broken,
not a victim. I learnt that everything I needed was within me. And that my mental health and my inner life was the essence and driving force of my existence.

I now want to challenge and inspire you to move beyond your old stories so you can embrace possibility and fulfill your potential. So, if that is where you are in your life, I invite you to come visit with me every Friday.

The conversation is honest, the topics are varied, the perspectives are from many angles, but the bottom line is always
Self Love Self Care First. I hope you will join me in a journey of discovery, wonder, growth and a celebration of our truth.

And love

Because what else is there to talk about?

Be well, Do well, Live well,
Warmly,
Sunita

Friday, September 27, 2019

Twyla Tharp's Wise and Inspiring Words are Perfect for Making Self Love Self Care First a Ritual


Hello,
It's Sunita here.

Self Love Self Care First sounds simple enough to do. But this simplicity of concept is deceptive. It's the hardest thing to do, for a variety of reasons. There are many barriers that we all have to truly loving ourselves. So how can one start on the journey of loving ourselves?

Establish a ritual that leads to the practice of Self Love Self Care First.

But how?

Right now, one of the books that I am reading is Twyla Tharp's 'The Creative Habit'. Well reading is not exactly what I am doing. I'm reading, underlining, re-reading, highlighting, absorbing, re-reading... You get the picture.

For anyone who is creative (that means everyone) and wants to maximize their gift and talents, Twyla Tharp's book is an absolute must. She lays down a plan for those who believe that creativity is temperamental and fleeting. And think that we must bow down to it's ebbs and flow. Twyla disputes that and generously gives simple, bit by bit instructions on how to design a life style of habits that promote and enhance your creative output.

Chapter 2 of 'The Creative Habit- Learn It And Use It for Life' is titled Rituals of Preparation. Twyla writes,

 "I begin each day of my life with a ritual...
It's a simple act, but doing it the same way each morning habitualizes it- makes it repeatable, easy to do. It reduces the chance that I would skip it or do it differently. It is one more item in my arsenal of routines, and one less thing to think about....
First steps are hard...
It's vital to establish some rituals- automatic but decisive patterns of behavior- at the beginning of the creative process, when you are most at peril of turning back, chickening out, giving up,or going the wrong way.
...Thinking of it as a ritual has a transforming effect on the activity. Turning something into a ritual eliminates the question. Why am I doing this? ...
The ritual erases the question of whether or not I like it. It is also a friendly reminder that I'm doing the right thing." 


     I've done it before. It was good. I'll do it again.

I ask that you imagine creativity to be Self Love Self Care First. Think of all the barriers that come between you and regularly practicing SLSCF. It maybe mental illness, depression, a busy schedule, a need to do for others before caring for yourself, being in an abusive relationship, etc., etc. The list is endless and topics for many future discussions but for today, we will not delve deep into the challenges of putting ourselves first.

Today is about establishing rituals. 

What can you do to start your day on a note of self love and self care? What ritual can you establish to prevent talking yourself out of taking care of yourself first, and prioritizing your well being?

A couple of suggestions,
  1. Put on your exercise clothes and sneakers as soon as you wake up. A cue to your brain to work out.
  2. Open your journal. A cue to write.
  3. Set your alarm to get up an hour before the rest of your family. A cue to have that time reserved for you to devote exclusively to you and your interests.
  4. Light a candle. A cue to meditate and reflect.
There are no limits to what you can conjure up as your ritual. It will be unique and intuitive to your definition of self love self care first. The ritual will be your gateway to taking care of yourself first- before you offer your energy and efforts to others. 

As Twyla wisely said,

First Steps Are Hard


Make a ritual a habit. That habit will become a practice. That practice will eventually become a way of life.

Try it. It works. I know it does and Twyla knows it does. Her magnificent career and life is evidence of it. She is creative, productive and brilliant. I am inspired by her spirit and dedicate this blog to her.

Wishing you discovery of your unique ritual of SLSCF,
Be well Do well Live well
Love,
Sunita

#selfloveselfcarefirst#twylatharp#thecreativehabit#rituals#selflove#selfcare#habit#practice#inspiration


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