My book of poetry, "Stripping- My fight to find Me" is a story of the triumph of the human spirit. It is a story of our deep need for connection and the infinite power of love to heal.

I am energy. I am infinity. But I am also a poet, author, artist. wife, mother, sleep doctor, and attachment and complex childhood trauma survivor. I healed only when I understood I was broken, not a victim. I learnt that everything I needed was within me. And that my inner life was the essence and driving force of my existence.

Where did Self Love Self Care First® come from?

I needed to find meaning in my suffering so I kept thinking, “What truth did I come out of this journey with? How can I share what I know in forms other than what I receive through my poetry? What is the most foundational and fundamental truth about human existence that I discovered to be true in my suffering? That is where SLSCF® comes from.

I discovered that if we do not know our truth, we cannot love ourselves. The pain and suffering of our lives, the false external messages about life, success and achievement that we receive, and the projections and imposed expectations of others we are subjected to, mangle our truth, distract us from our destined path, and cut deep into our body, mind, and soul. They cause us to not pay attention to ourselves, and to how we live our lives. These feelings and beliefs descend into our unconscious and become habitual patterns that hijack our lives.

SelfLoveSelfCareFirst® is the journey of truthful self-examination and acceptance of our truth. Only when we are ready to find value, love, and compassion for our true selves do we begin to live free.

This blog is a celebration of love, stillness, growth, joy, discovery, and the truth. The conversation is honest, the topics are varied, the perspectives are from many angles, but the common thread weaving the discussions together is Self Love Self Care First®.

You are not moving towards any light. There is no light out there. It is inside you. You must move inwards- not outwards to look for it. No one can guide you there. Only you can give yourself the permission to embark on this journey. Only you can reclaim yourself.

Your freedom is in your hands.


Thursday, December 14, 2023

I've Moved and Hope You'll Come With Me!

Dear friend,
It's Sunita here.
I’ve been writing Self Love Self Care First here since 2018. 
I am excited to now bring it to a new platformI hope you will come with me. It has truly been a privilege to serve you thus far and I would love the opportunity to continue to do so.

A space where everyone is welcome. 
Journeying from trauma to transcendence with some stops and awe and wonder along the way. 
Reclaiming ourselves may seem hard but I learnt that it's not impossible.

Come join us!

My blog is about the process and journey of reclaiming our true selves. 

We are not moving towards any light. 

There is no light out there. 

It is inside us.

We must move inwards, not outwards, to look for the light.

Reclaiming ourselves may seem hard but I learnt that it’s not impossible. But only we can give ourselves permission to embark on this journey.

My guiding intention remains the same even though the platform that hosts my blog has changed. 

That intention is as follows,

What do I know? 

How do I put it forward in a way that is dignified for the receiver and me?


Moving forwards, 



Tuesday, October 17, 2023

Are We Trading Awe and Wonder for Usual and Customary?


It's Sunita here,

I notice that we put ourselves and others in boxes that often do not have much of a relationship with reality.

Or possibility, for that matter.

We do that to simplify the process of comprehending life, others and ourselves.

Stripping nuance, context and complexity from our thought process may make us more efficient in navigating life, but it leaves us living in the margin of what could be.

We make a deal to trade awe and wonder for usual and customary.

What box do you want to get out of today?

I’m thinking about that question and will carefully examine how I’m looking outwardly today so I can identify a box I’ve put myself in. A box that is yet unknown to me.

Awe and Wonder- let it be known that I’m seeking you today. 

Let’s meet!

Moving forwards,

Tuesday, September 5, 2023

Rainer Maria Rilke's Profound Insight on Those Who Are Able to Comfort Us


It's Sunita here.

We are all in this life together.

Each one of us is connected.

Along the path, at those times when we get overwhelmed with the problems of our life, we often lose sight of the fact that others are also muddling their way through life.

When offered words of comfort and hope that help us to feel better as we work through our road blocks, we may fail to remember this simple, but deep insight from Rilke,

“Do not believe that he who seeks to comfort you lives untroubled among the simple and quiet words that sometimes do you good. His life has much difficulty and sadness and remains far behind yours. We’re it otherwise, he would never have been able to find those words.” - From Letters to a Young Poet.

Life brings us challenges. But that’s what it’s here to do. We humans have a tremendous reserve capacity to overcome adversity and have the ability to rise above those challenges and emerge better, bigger, stronger, smarter and more flexible than before.

TWBH is all about stripping away the layers that conceal the very best we can become.

That is the space when we can just be.

Hope you stay tuned.

Moving forwards,

Monday, August 28, 2023

This is The Biggest Betrayal of All


It's Sunita here.

The betrayal that wounds us the most is that which we commit against ourselves.

TWBH offers a way out of perpetual suffering.

But first, we have to connect our suffering to the belief that we can work through it and emerge as the human we were designed to be. 

Hope is a wonderful starting point of our journey to heal, transform and transcend but it takes consistent effort to get out of our cycle of suffering. 

 You are worth it. 

 Do the work. 

Moving forwards,

  #TWBH #The Way Back Home #selfbetrayal #selfsabotage #learnedbehaviors #faith #hope #dothework #trauma #traumatreatment #relearning #therapy #neuroplasticity #neuroscience #selfempowerment

Monday, August 21, 2023

Trauma leads to Transformation and Transcendence if We Let It


It's Sunita here,

We are living in a time when we are starting to understand trauma in ways that are leading to effective treatments.

In addition to treatment of trauma, we need shared stories of lived and learned experiences of healing from trauma.

That is what TWBH offers.

I know from my own experience that trauma can be treated in ways that allow us to move forward with the essence of who we truly are. This is accompanied with the capacity to learn new skills and ways of looking at our experiences that are positive, warm, and fresh.

Yes, our trauma may never leave us but it can be transformed in ways that set us free to lead authentic, powerful, creative and fulfilling lives of meaning and purpose.

The world needs our contributions.

We have much to offer.

Trauma can be the beginning of our journey of transformation.

And even transcendence.

TWBH-The Way back Home is through doing the work.

TWBH- The Poetry. The Process. The Practice. The Provisions.

Moving forwards,

Tuesday, August 8, 2023

Trauma is Just the Beginning of Our Story


It's Sunita here.

Trauma is just the beginning of our story. Not the end.

But we will need to do our work to change the course of our life.

That's a fact.

The sooner we can accept and embrace this reality, the sooner we can start doing the work that we must to become who we truly are.

So, we had trauma.
Now what?

There is help out there but we must seek it.

There are those who love us out there but we must seek their assistance.

There is inherent worth in who we are but we must excavate it.

We are worthy.

We are unique.

We are special.

And we are worth doing all the hard work that we must in order to feel worthy all the time.

I believe you are worth it and invite you to do the work.

Moving forwards,

Tuesday, August 1, 2023

This is The Most Effective and Sustainable Place to Succeed From


It's Sunita here,

Growth from a place of self love is more powerful and long lasting than from a feeling of inadequacy and self hatred.

I believe that with all my being.

I also believe that science will find a way to quantify this truth in the future.

But I'm not waiting for that to happen.

The time for Self Love Self Care First is now.

Self love is not indulgent or selfish.

The practice of SLSCF is necessary for us to be able to connect to the deepest parts of our humanity and to be empowered to make the contributions that we must in order to ensure the survival of our species.

Plus, SLSCF is a kinder, gentler way to be in this world.

More to come on The Practice of SLSCF if you stay tuned here. I hope you will.

Be kind to yourself and hold yourself to the highest level of SLSCF accountability.

Build your capacity for self compassion and mercy.

Learn and grow from that place.

Until next time,
Moving forwards,